Showing posts with label michael jackson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label michael jackson. Show all posts
Jul 14, 2009
Jul 9, 2009
For Shame
Judy Berman of Salon had this to say about Paris Jackson speaking at her father's memorial:
...even if Paris' words of affection and loss were completely genuine, I can't help but worry that her emotional debut was exploitative. Shouldn't a truly loving family know better than to spotlight the grief of an 11 year old who has just lost a parent?
Really? I find this kind of speculation, and there's been lots of it, to be unspeakably cruel. The girl was standing with her family, who obviously had no intention of her speaking, when she tapped her aunt on the arm and asked to say something about the only parent she's ever had; a parent who the world assumed abused and damaged her.
I'm guessing Berman has never been to the funeral of a parent of young children. Some years ago, my former boyfriend's older sister (a controversial character in her own right, whose parenting skills were also constantly in question) passed away. Her young daughter stood at her service and spoke, and although I can't remember what she said, I do know that for the rest of her life she will be proud of herself for having the courage and maturity to stand for her mother and be an active participant in putting her to rest.
Our culture is taught to pussyfoot around children. Don't say bad words around them, don't show emotion around them, shield them from anything negative and "adult"; but we forget the incredible emotional maturity young people are capable of, for better or worse. Our under-the-age-of-18 peers are people too, with the right to bury and eulogize and celebrate. Perhaps the discomfort here is not about any of this, but about our own guilt. As fragile dolls whisked here and there with silly masks and scarves over their faces, the Jackson children were merely one more link in the "Wacko Jacko" chain. But we are now faced with the reality of three young children who have lost their father, and we can no longer make fun or be cynical. It's hard to feel feelings, and Paris Jackson and her family are now being villianized to make the world feel better about being so damn mean. For shame!
...even if Paris' words of affection and loss were completely genuine, I can't help but worry that her emotional debut was exploitative. Shouldn't a truly loving family know better than to spotlight the grief of an 11 year old who has just lost a parent?
Really? I find this kind of speculation, and there's been lots of it, to be unspeakably cruel. The girl was standing with her family, who obviously had no intention of her speaking, when she tapped her aunt on the arm and asked to say something about the only parent she's ever had; a parent who the world assumed abused and damaged her.
I'm guessing Berman has never been to the funeral of a parent of young children. Some years ago, my former boyfriend's older sister (a controversial character in her own right, whose parenting skills were also constantly in question) passed away. Her young daughter stood at her service and spoke, and although I can't remember what she said, I do know that for the rest of her life she will be proud of herself for having the courage and maturity to stand for her mother and be an active participant in putting her to rest.
Our culture is taught to pussyfoot around children. Don't say bad words around them, don't show emotion around them, shield them from anything negative and "adult"; but we forget the incredible emotional maturity young people are capable of, for better or worse. Our under-the-age-of-18 peers are people too, with the right to bury and eulogize and celebrate. Perhaps the discomfort here is not about any of this, but about our own guilt. As fragile dolls whisked here and there with silly masks and scarves over their faces, the Jackson children were merely one more link in the "Wacko Jacko" chain. But we are now faced with the reality of three young children who have lost their father, and we can no longer make fun or be cynical. It's hard to feel feelings, and Paris Jackson and her family are now being villianized to make the world feel better about being so damn mean. For shame!
Jul 8, 2009
Jul 7, 2009
Verses
"We Had Him"
Written by Maya Angelou
Read by Queen Latifah
Beloveds -
Now we know that we know nothing
Now that our bright and shining star
Can slip away from our fingertips
Like a puff of subtle wind, without notice
Our dear love can escape our doting embrace
Sing our songs among the stars
and walk our dances across the face of the moon
In the instant we learn that Michael is gone
We know nothing
No clocks can tell our time
and no oceans can rush our tides
With the abrupt absence of our treasure
Though we are many, each of us is achingly alone
Piercingly alone
Only when we confess our confusion
Can we remember that he was a gift to us
and we did have him
He came to us from the creator
Trailing creativity in abundance
Despite the anguish of life
He was sheathed in mother love, in family love
and survived
and did more than that
He thrived
With passion and compassion, humor and style
We had him
Whether we knew who he was
Or did not know
He was ours
and we were his
We had him
Beautiful
Delighting our eyes
He tipped his hat, slant over his brow
and took a pose on his toes for all of us
and we laughed and stomped our feet for him
We were enchanted with his passion
Because he held nothing
He gave us all he had been given
Today, in Toyko
Beneath the Eiffel Tower
In Ghana's Black Star Square
In Birmingham, Alabama and Birmingham, England
We are missing Michael Jackson
But we do know we had him
and we are the world
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