Verses

Randy: That techno-rock you guys listen to is gutless.

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Julie Richman: Do you think she really does all the stuff she says?
Stacey: I mean, who could make up 'That stuff tastes like Clorox.'?

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Fred Bailey: So, you wanna dance?
Girl: In another life!
Fred Bailey: Yeah, I didn't either. I was just taking a poll.

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Randy: Where do you work?
Julie Richman: At my parents' store.
Randy: What do they sell?
Julie Richman: Health foods.
Randy: That's cool.
Julie Richman: Like, it's not cool at all! Like, it's all this stuff that tastes like nothing and it's supposed to be so good for you. Why couldn't they, like, open a Pizza Hut or something?

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Julie Richman: I'll start my diet tomorrow.
Stacey: You better watch out, because Randy might like the Hollywood lean look.
Suzi Brent: Yeah, but blimps don't get to go out with Tommy.
Julie Richman: Who?
Stacey: Tommy.
Julie Richman: Who?
Loryn, Stacey, and Suzi: [in unison] TOMMY!
Julie Richman: Fuck him!

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[behind the stage curtain at the Valley High junior prom]
Fred Bailey: Ahh! Stacey! Hey, man, check out Stacey!
Randy: I don't wanna see Stacey.
[peeks from behind the curtain in time to see Tommy kiss Julie on the dance floor]
Randy: Ugh! That's it! Man, I've had it with you, Bailey!
Fred Bailey: What? I didn't think her haircut was that bad.
Randy: What do you mean, her haircut? I just want to know what the rest of this grand plan of yours is.
Fred Bailey: No, man, this is it! Simplicity at its finest.
Randy: Simplicity at its finest. Well, at least you got us here. So let's...
Randy and Fred (in unison): ...crush that fly!

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Randy: [to Julie after she dumps him] Well fuck you, for sure, like totally!

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Tommy: It appears as though you forgot our French fries and a coke, fishhead.
Randy: Oh, well, Peter Piper picked a pepper, I guess I did!

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Julie Richman: [to her friends] Man, he's like tripendicular, ya know?

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Julie Richman: Like they're staring right at us.
Stacey: Gross! Let's move.

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Fred Bailey: Do you believe a girl should pet on the first date?
Girl: Who are you... Bozo the Clown?

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Steve Richman: [about Julie] Sarah, do you know how much she looks like you?
Sarah Richman: Do I still look that way?
Steve Richman: Better!

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Randy: [shouting over the noise just as the music ends] So, when can I see you again?
Julie Richman: [embarassed] Gee, Randy... why don't you wait until the end of the evening to say these things?
Randy: It's how I feel.
Julie Richman: I'm here with you now.

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Randy: [warily surveying party food] What's that?
Suzi Brent: It's like sushi, don't ya know? Like this here is tuna...
[a guest takes a huge bite]
Randy: [looking disgusted] Dig in, Fred.

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Fred Bailey: [introducing himself to Julie and Stacey] Hi, I'm Fred. I like tacos and '71 Cabernet. My favorite color is magenta.

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Tommy: [about his recent break-up with Julie] Who else is there? No other Val dude can touch me. She must really be freaking out.

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Julie Richman: Yeah, but Tommy can be such a dork, ya know? Like he's got the bod, but his brains are bad news.
Suzi Brent: But he is bitchin'. You really are so lucky, Julie.
Julie Richman: I know, but we've been going together so long now. Like I'm beginning to think I'm a piece of furniture or something... like an old chair!
Loryn: Oh, bad news!
Julie Richman: [glancing at Brad] I definitely need something new.

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Stacey: Fred?
Fred Bailey: Stacey?
Stacey: God you're so weird go away!
Fred Bailey: My little pickle. My darling.
Stacey: Like this is so embarrassing.
Fred Bailey: Well I think you're cute
Stacey: My God.

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Tommy: [while getting his ticket torn by Randy, who is working as an usher and wearing 3D glasses] Bitchin'! Is this in 3D?
Randy: No, but you're face is.

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Randy: No one is gonna tell me who I can score with! Now I want this chick, she wants me, so fuck it, we're goin' back.